Alterations to the Clothing Budget

Cutting back on the clothing budget can be really hard. Somehow it feels more personal than other things. But, it is often necessary, and it can make a huge difference in our overall spending. Here are a few strategies to help. Choose the ones that work for you.

1. Keep careful track of how much you spend on clothes each month. Sometimes just seeing the numbers will help you come back to reality.

2. Learn to be thrifty. Check out this article from the April Ensign. Jane McBride Choate gives great practical advice for getting everyone dressed while staying on budget.

3. Make some new rules. If you are too often finding items that are irresistible, maybe it's time to set some guidelines. The easiest rule to make this: if you don't have money left in the clothing budget you can't buy it, no matter how cute it is. You can add in some more creative rules, though. Use your imagination. My cousin-in-law used to keep herself in check by selecting one color every year. If an item wasn't available in that color, she couldn't buy it. My mom's strategy was to make me think about it for a while. If it's still irresistible tomorrow, you can always come back. Or try this: you can't buy anything new until you've worn everything in your closet at least twice!

4. Buy clothes that fit and flatter. Usually when I throw clothes out without wearing them much, it is because they never quite fit right or they emphasize my figure in awkward ways. It doesn't matter how trendy it is; only buy if it looks great on you.

5. Speaking of trends... If you don't love it, skip it.

6. Shop with cash. Somehow money is more real when you hold it in your hands. A few months ago, Jeremy and I gave each other a sorely needed clothing bonus-- in cash. It was great. I always knew how much money I had left, and I managed to make it last.

7. Learn to love the thrift store. With a little patience you can find some great stuff here (I promise). You may not find it this time, though... Thrift stores also offer a dose of perspective: You can see what things look like after they have been washed a few times. And you won't be overcome by the chic atmosphere. It's all about you and the clothes. Do they fit right? Do you enjoy wearing them? Okay.

8. Avoid marital tension. At our house, we do this by making clothing come out of our personal allowance. Electronics also come out of our allowance. I buy clothes; Jeremy buys computers. All is budgetary bliss.

9. Don't shop for recreation. (This bit of advice comes from my family finance professor, Alena Johnson ). If you have enough clothes, and you're bored, you can always make someone cookies.

p.s. I love cookies

10. Be you. Remember that old Mormonad? "Be you're own kind of beautiful." If not, here's a link. We really can't be everything. Enjoy the beauty and talents of others; be beautiful and talented yourself; but don't be the same.

Agreeing on Expenses in Marriage

Julianne and I have it pretty easy, we agree on almost all of our expenses, and the rest are small enough to fit into our personal allowances (see Giving Yourself an Allowance).

I know people who aren't so fortunate - who have large expenses that they can't agree on. When one spouse wants to make a large purchase that the other spouse does not support, this can result in major conflict - whether or not the money is spent. It can bring on feelings of martyrdom or of not being supported. The battleground over expenses can then quickly expand.

Here's an article discussing the importance of having similar financial goals, and ways to work out our differences when we don't: The Key to Wedded Bliss? Money Matters. One piece of advice that struck me as especially useful was to seek the help of mediators when necessary. And really, divorce is expensive, much more expensive than foregoing a few things you want, and letting your spouse get a few things you may think are unnecessary. Families are more important than finances, and letting money tear a marriage apart is foolish.

Who is Responsible for the Family Budget?

For the greatest happiness and productivity in life, both husband and wife are needed. Their efforts interlock and are complementary. Each has individual traits that best fit the role the Lord has defined for happiness as a man or woman. When used as the Lord intends, those capacities allow a married couple to think, act, and rejoice as one[.]

Richard G. Scott, The Joy of Living the Great Plan of Happiness

In the family where I grew up, my father did the finances. In Jeremy's family, his mother did them. So, naturally, when we got married each of us hoped the other would do them.

It took us a long time to figure out who would be responsible for our money.

In the meantime, we had a budget, but we didn't follow it well or keep detailed records. Bills got paid on time, usually, but we spent more and saved less than we should have.

Fortunately, Jeremy stepped up and decided we needed to put together a better system. Every family is different, but here is what works for us:

1. Jeremy set up budgeting software and makes sure it is working correctly.

2. I go through our expenses every week online and label them with the proper budget category.

3. Jeremy pays online bills.

4. I pay bills that require writing a check.

5. Together, we discuss the budget and make changes as needed.

6. Jeremy files taxes.

7. I deposit most checks.

8. Jeremy manages our investments and keeps me informed.

9. Both of us are responsible for staying within budget.

Talking About Money

Here's a great article from the New York Times:

Four Talks About Money

I especially like the section about "desired level of affluence", and how important it is for both spouses to agree. Things have worked out well for us financially partly because neither of us had strong expectations of affluence.